Knowing Your SOGIESC Solidifies Your Authentic Self

Featuring Pau, a proud non-binary voice navigating both professional and personal life as an adult content creator

When we talk about Pride, we often think of parades, flags, and celebration. But at its heart, Pride is also about something deeply personal: the freedom to know and live your truth.

For Pau—also known as SoftBoy as an adult content creator—that journey began early, in moments that many queer kids might relate to: choosing dolls over toy cars, playing dress-up with sisters, and just feeling… different. But back then, there weren’t words like SOGIESC to explain what was going on.

“It wasn’t until I learned about SOGIESC—Sexual Orientation, Gender Identity and Expression, and Sex Characteristics—that everything started to make sense,” Pau shares.

Today, Pau proudly identifies as Gender Fluid—someone whose gender shifts in expression and feeling. Some days, they radiate softness and grace. Other days, they embody strength and boldness. And all of that, every version, is valid.

But the path wasn’t always smooth.

Like many in the queer community—especially those in sex work or adult content creation—Pau has had to mute parts of their identity just to feel safe. The world still places people in boxes: “You have to act like this.” “Dress like that.” “Stay quiet.” Yet through the years, Pau learned that shrinking yourself is never the answer.

“The moment I embraced my SOGIESC was the moment I truly met myself,”  Pau says.

At the moment, Pau is working professionally in the BPO industry and is also exploring adult content creation. There was a time—when they had to suppress his true self and present a version of himself that the world and community expected. It was hard, painful even, but now, Pau is grateful to say that they no longer has to mute any part of who they is, especially his feminine side. In both his workplace and personal life, Pau, right now feels safe, seen, and respected. And that is a freedom they envisioned for all of us.

Pau learned that showing his true colors, his authentic self—no matter how bright, bold, soft, or subtle—is far more powerful than hiding in the shadows. There are still places in our world where people like us(queer, trans, part of the community) aren’t fully accepted, and if you’re

currently in one of those spaces or situations, We see you. We embrace you Kapatid! You are not alone. And when you’re ready—whenever that may be—we will be here, cheering you on.
Holding space. Welcoming you out into the open, with arms wide and hearts fierce.

Understanding SOGIESC Matters

SOGIESC isn’t just a buzzword. It’s a framework that helps all of us better understand how we experience the world:

• Sexual Orientation – who you’re attracted to
• Gender Identity – your internal sense of being (e.g., man, woman, non-binary)
• Gender Expression – how you show that identity to the world
  
• Sex Characteristics – physical traits you’re born with

It reminds us that gender and sexuality aren’t black and white. They’re a spectrum—and each point on that spectrum is deserving of respect.

Pau’s Message to the Queer and Non-Binary Sex Work Community

For those navigating both queerness and sex work, the stigma can double. Even within the LGBTQIA+ community, some stories feel “too complicated” to name. But Pau is living proof that your identity is never “too much.”

“You are not alone. And when you’re ready—whenever that may be—we will be here, cheering you on with open arms,” Pau says.

“Hiding your light doesn’t make it any less bright.”

Why Knowing Your SOGIESC Is Empowering

Knowing your SOGIESC is not just about “coming out.” It’s about coming home to yourself. It gives you language. It gives you power. It helps you set boundaries, find your people or safe spaces, and stand tall in a world that sometimes wants you to stay/be small.

“Understanding your SOGIESC is not just about labels—it’s about knowing yourself, loving yourself, and validating your own emotions,” Pau reminds us.

The fight for acceptance doesn’t end outside the LGBTQIA+ community—it continues within it. From femmephobia to sex work stigma to gatekeeping queerness, Pau’s experience reminds us to do better, be softer, and hold space for each other’s stories.

This Pride Month, and every month after, let’s make room for stories like Pau’s. Stories that don’t fit into neat categories. Stories that are layered, real, and full of love.

Because knowing your SOGIESC doesn’t just change how others see you—it changes how you see yourself. And in that truth, you shine. 

Understanding SOGIESC: A Guide to Knowing (and Loving) Who You Are

SOGIESC might look like a big academic word, pero ‘wag ka ma-intimidate, Beks! It's a tool that helps us understand ourselves beyond the labels na pinilit sa’tin ng lipunan. It stands for:

Sexual Orientation

• Kanino ka naa-attract?
  This is about who you're romantically or sexually attracted to. 

Examples:

• Heterosexual – Attracted to a different gender (girl-boy)
• Homosexual – Attracted to the same gender (girl-girl, boy-boy)
• Bisexual – Attracted to more than one gender
• Asexual – Not  attracted to anyone sexually
• Pansexual – Attracted to people regardless of gender

Note: You don’t have to “prove” your orientation. If you feel it, it’s valid.

Gender Identity

•  Sino ka sa loob?
  This is how you internally understand yourself. It's your own sense of being a man, a woman, both, neither, or something else.

• Cisgender – Gender identity is aligned with the sex assigned at birth
• Transgender – Gender identity is not aligned with the assigned sex
• Non-binary / Genderqueer / Genderfluid – Identities outside the binary of “man” or “woman”
• Agender – No gender at all

Gender identity is personal. It’s not always visible. It’s not for others to decide.

Gender Expression

•  Paano mo pinapakilala o pinapakitaa ang sarili mo sa Publiko??
  This is how you present your gender to the world—through clothes, appearance, voice, movement, style, etc.

• Feminine – Soft, elegant, colorful (expressions that society often reads as associated with women or femininity)
• Masculine – Rough, bold, lowkey (expressions that society often reads as associated with men or masculinity)
• Androgynous / Neutral – A mix or neither of the two genders.

Expression doesn’t define your identity. You can be a masculine gay man, or a feminine straight guy. Walang nakaka-encapsulate ng pagkatao mo kundi ikaw mismo. What matters is that your expression reflects who you are, not who you’re told to be.

Sex Characteristics

• Ano ang physical traits mo mula pagkabata?
  These include your body parts, chromosomes, and hormones. Usually used to assign someone “male” or “female” at birth. But let’s remember: Biology is not destiny.

Some people are born intersex—with sex traits that don’t fit typical definitions of male or female. And that’s perfectly natural too.

Why Is SOGIESC Important?

Because it gives us language and permission to explore who we are, without fear, shame, or being boxed in.

It tells the world: “I am more than what you see.”
It tells you: “I have the right to know and love my full self.”

SOGIESC Is for Everyone — Not Just LGBTQIA+

Yes, Beks! Even straight, cisgender people have SOGIESC. We all do!

It’s not an “LGBT-only” thing — it’s a human thing. The more we understand it, the more we can:

• Unlearn stereotypes
• Build inclusive spaces
• Fight discrimination
• Heal internalized shame